Brother: John Cena.
Sister: Kaitlyn.
Mom: Kelly Kelly.
Dad: Randy Orton.
Aunt: Michelle McCool.
Uncle: The Undertaker.
Cousin: The Miz.
Girlfriend/Boyfriend: Mickie James and R-Truth.
Randy Orton doesn't know his daughter (Kaitlyn) is seeing R-Truth behind us back, so Orton asks the 'voices in his head' what to do, and they tell him to punt R-Truth, so, Orton punts R-Truth, putting R-Truth in the hospital and on life support. Orton is taken to jail, and, when he is asked why he did it, Orton says the 'voices' told him too. Instead of going to jail, Orton is taken to a asylum.
John Cena is accused of killing Mickie James (who mysteriously died the night before R-Truth got punted), he is found not guilty, and it is revealed that Mickie James murderer was Michelle McCool. Michelle McCool is taken to jail. John Cena goes up to the judge, who happens to be The Rock, and says ''You Can't See Me!'', the Rock declares Cena is insane, and is put in the same asylum as Orton, his father.
Kelly Kelly and Undertaker start a romantic relationship and go to Las Vegas for a while, and elope (despite Taker being married to McCool (in jail) and Kelly being married to Orton (declared mentally unstable).
The Miz (the cousin), who knows that nobody is in the Orton household breaks into the house, and steals all their stuff, credit cards, clothes, etc. He forgets that Kaitlyn is still there, so he and Kaitlyn run off to Alabama, where incest marriages are legal.
Randy Orton.
Status: Mentally Unstable.
R-Truth.
Status: Alive, but on life support, a few years later, his brothers Booker T and Mark Henry pull the plug, killing Truth instantly.
Mickie James.
Status: Deceased, murdered by Michelle McCool.
Kelly Kelly.
Status: Married to two guys Undertaker and Randy Orton. After a heated argument with Undertaker, he chokeslammed her. Deceased.
John Cena.
Status: Mentally Unstable.
Kaitlyn.
Status: Moved to Alabama, where incest is tolerated.
The Miz.
Status: Moved to Alabama where incest is tolerated.
Michelle McCool.
Status: Deceased. She got legal injection a few days after her arrest.
.... Yeah, it's a screwed up family....
Rate it outta 10
